Wednesday, July 23, 2008


Yeah, I kind of like to reward my readers with some recurring themes and terms. Some of these have actually caught on pretty heavily accross the blogosphere. Either way, I thought it was about time for me to let you guys in on the secrets. Let me know if I need to add something here, email is on the other page. This is not in alphabetical order, use your ctrl+F like a normal person.

(Click the term to see all posts with that label)


Joe Collector (RETIRED)

First mentioned here. Basically this is the guy that makes me so angry that I get an ulcer. These guys are those certain collectors that post all their maildays on message boards, use "Mojo" in really annoying ways (see also Mojo), live for making a profit on cards, and have no problem fighting you tooth and nail on any sensible point about the hobby. They are generally so UNINFORMED that they fight to remain in their ignorance. They price all their cards using Beckett instead of current market value, and they thrive on the glory that they supposedly get for everything. They use an abundance of exclamation points in anything they post and they love to make sure people know that they have a very high opinion of themselves. This is an ongoing thing on the blog because there are so many of these people.

Privileged Portion

First mentioned here. These people are the ones that read about the hobby, and make it a point to find out what is behind the curtain. If you are reading this page you are probably a part of this group of collectors. Most of the time, these people are very knowlegable about cards and the hobby, though they dont always spend a lot of money to get the high priced bullshit that is out there. If they post on message boards, they dont forget the rules of the road, and they rarely ever use an exclamation point unless they are screaming at a Joe collector.

Idiot Bomb

First mentioned here. Its basically the equivilent of the gamma radiation that turned Bruce Banner into the hulk. When a group a JCs get together, its basically like an idiot bomb went off. Beware, the effects of an idiot bomb are poisonous to everyone with an IQ over 10.

Idiot Bomb Message Board

First mentioned here. This is what I call the Beckett message boards. Around 2000, the biggest idiot bomb in history went off, the result is the BMB. Since that time, there have been few survivors of its nauxious fumes.

First World

First mentioned here. The group of collectors that focus on cheaper low end products, collecting sets, and buying retail to complete those. Highlights for them are Allen and Ginter and the base Topps sets.

Second World

First mentioned here. The group of collectors that buy mid to high end products, dont care a bit about base cards, and are more likely to love Autos and Jerseys rather than normal stuff. Highlights for these people are Exquisite, SP Authentic, and Most DLP Football Products. SCU is mostly focused on this world of collecting.


First discussed here. This term is the battle cry of all Joe Collectors. I assume it was first used by some idiot who had watched Austin Powers or the Simpsons and then pulled a jersey card or something similar. Because he was so ridiculously happy, he was at a loss for words. The only thing that came out was "MOJO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" Since this black date in history, it has become inescapable to roam the IBMB without finding some douchebag who loves to scream it at the top of his lungs. The worst instance of this word is when a JC uses a player's name or nickname and some form of it. For instance, when pulling an Adrian Peterson card they would say "OMFGLOLZGSDGSDG ALLDAY-JO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" Take notice, this happens once a week.


First mentioned here. Stands for "The Worlds Greatest Marketplace," eBay's (former?) tagline. If you arent familiar with eBay you must have been living in some JCs basement while he looks up his cards in a 1989 Beckett Baseball Mag.


First mentioned here. Just the simple reality that every single set no matter how expensive or cheap will have a jersey card to pull. Its became the standard and then it became annoying. Now with "DNA Relics" we can all guess where this is headed. Plus, it sucks that they cut up pieces of history for profit.


My creedo on Beckett is here, here, and here. Check it out. My public enemy number one.

Rediculous, Redicolos, Rodixsiles, etc

For some reason, stupid people cant spell this fucking word. The proper spelling is not that hard. Go get a fucking dictionary you turds.